Battle of the Sexes

This article pointed out a number of ways that miscommunication plays out. Even starting as children, the sex-seperate groups have different organizational structures. As Tannen says " For women, as for girls, intimacy is the fabric of relationships and talk is the thread from which it is woven." "Bonds between boys can be intense as girls, but they are based on less talking, more on doing things together."
When reading this article, I couldn't help but relate some of the situations to my own relationship with my boyfriend. When Tannen says , " when women tell men " you aren't listening, and the men protest, I am, the men are right". (Beedles 242)This happens all the time with me and my boyfriend. We will be conversating on the phone, or watching TV, and I will tell him a story of something that happened during the day, or some upcoming events, and I am finished and it's silent or he's still staring at the TV, and I, like what Tannen points out, say "You aren't listening!", and he replies " I Am", then casually repeats almost everything I had just said. Tannen points out that the fact that the tendency of men to face away can give women the impression they aren't listening even when they are, and this article, and him quoting me word for word, makes me realize he actually is listening.
Another example from the article that I can relate to is switching topics. "Switching topics is another habit that gives women the imprssion men aren't listening, especially if they switch to a topic about themselves. (Beedles 243)" I will again, be telling him something and the next thing I know he is bringing up his car or something along those lines. I know he hears me, but doesn't respond, which makes me feel like he didn't hear anything I said.
After reading this article, I feel that alot of the 50 percent divorce rate is derived from an "epidemic of failed conversation", and if couples would read some of the points pointed out about the opposite sex, arguments might be resolved much easier. Even within my own relationship, we have been together for two years and no eachother good enough to understand how eachother communicates, but regardless, this points Tannen points out in this article makes me understand a little better why is appears he isn't listening when he really is. I found this article really interesting and was glad I could relate to some of the points she made.